June 10, 2017 by dicletasman
“Abjection comes from the Latin abicere, which means ‘to throw away’ or ‘to cast off, away, or out’.” (Arya, R., 2014, p. 3).
“The inability to separate entirely the abject from the self, or to objectify the abject as an object, contributes to the complex relationship that we have with it, as indicated by the dual emotions that it invokes in us. We are both repelled by the abject (because of fear) and yet attracted to it (through our desire).” (Arya, R., 2014, p. 5).
The door opened.
As soon as “the girl” came out, her big brown eyes dazzled by the burning sun. She used her arm as a shield against it. Then she turned back to home, came back with the sunglasses covering her eyes and walked through the bus station. For 8 minutes, she kept looking repeatedly to her watch and the road. It was almost musical, rhythmic. Watch. Road. Watch Road… Watch. The bus came and she jumped to it.
Near to the bookstore, she got off the bus and walked through it. She took off her sunglasses, picked up few books and checked out their covers’. She opened them, ran her fingers over the pages, and smelled them while closing her eyes with a pleased face. Looking through one of the books, she suddenly stopped like she found “the one”. She put away the others and bought “the one”. Before leaving the bookstore, she wore her sunglasses and started to walk away from there.
She stopped in front the park, sat in a bank, and started to read the book…
While her eyes sliding to the left and right on the book pages, they suddenly stopped. She focused her look in the direction of the voice. There was a little girl, nothing else. But the voice was keeping coming through. Her eyes were wide-open and carefully looking through the little girl. The child’s arms, legs… The whole body was expanding. It was the voice of bones. The sounds of bones touching each other… While her body was expanding, her clothes were tearing apart. Finally, she was completely naked and keep expanding. Hairs starting to come out of her body and starting to resemble a male body. While “the girl” kept looking without closing her eyes, little girl’s body turned into a hairy body with a penis.
The girl stood up while keep staring at him. Took a step. Suddenly winced. His bones were fracturing and his body was bending. His skin was ripped apart. His joint bones, muscles could be seen. His blood was gushing out from his joints. The girl started to vomit. While food particles pouring out from her mouth, she was still trying to look at him. She was puking on herself, her clothes and shoes were getting dirty. While the place he was standing covered with blood, the place she was standing was covered with vomit.
His transformation was keeping going. His body was getting more and more inclined and hairs continued to come out everywhere. While his body was becoming animal-like, his face and hands were staying human-like. A long hairy tail got out from his back.
Their eyes met.
He slowly began to walk on his hands and feet towards the girl. She stepped her right foot back but did not move her left foot. His shape kept changing while he was walking through her. She was staring at him and staying put. They were looking at each other without blinking. The girl was throwing up, the man was gushing blood. They were getting closer… Closer… Close… Clos… Clo… C…
Arya, R. (2014). Abjection and Representation (1st ed). UK: Palgrave Macmillan.
Author Info: Dicle Rojda Tasman, MA Cand., Experimental Social Psychology Program (Baskent Un., Ankara) | email: dicletasman [AT] hotmail[.]com